My kitchen transformed from a silent haven into Grand Central Station in the blink of an eye. As I write these words, my husband is on a business call, the dog is barking, and someone has wandered in wondering what is for breakfast.
My first instinct is to respond to the disruptions with a snappy comment and a cold shoulder. I want to banish everyone to their assigned corner of the house. Having people around 24/7 tests my patience in ways I had not anticipated and am a little embarrassed to admit. Holding my tongue takes effort and not wearing my emotions on my sleeve is exhausting.
Are you experiencing the same thing?
Are you ready to throw in the towel before the marathon even starts?
Remember those tears we cried as we dropped children off last fall? Are you just as confused as I am about the prickly emotions which surface as these same loved one raid your pantry, on the hour, for the foreseeable future?
Uncertainty and unexpected emotions have captured my attention for the past few days. I do best when my schedule and routines are predictable. I savor silence and clarity. Both are absent in the midst of this shelter-in-place situation.
Embracing the imperfection of our current situation rather than trying to wrestle it back into a neat & tidy box is helping me.
When I expect too much of myself, I am quick to discover my limits. This is especially true when we are living in close quarters. Sometimes, it is easier to be hard on myself rather than embracing the grace on offer.
Instead of focusing on what I lack, I am making an effort to see myself (and others) through eyes of abundant mercy and love. It is a struggle to be sure, but this new outlook gives my soul the room it needs to breathe. Even in the midst of uncertainty.
Adapting to our new normal is going to take time & we need to give ourselves permission to fail.
Each and every one of us are new at this. There is no perfect approach to a pandemic.
It’s ok to feel off-kilter.
It’s ok to lose your peace.
What’s important is how you handle the aftermath.
Each time we have a choice: stick with the way we usually do things (expect perfection) or carve a new way forward with a vulnerable, “I’m sorry" (embrace imperfection). Moving through each day at a slower pace, anticipating that transitions will take longer just might make things a little easier on everyone.
It takes more time than we often allow to learn a new skill. And this is a new skill. Inviting the peace of forgiveness into uncertainty is worth the effort.
What if we see this period of time as an opportunity rather than an obligation?
What if we looked at this as a chance to try something new and resist the status quo?
Everyone is coming home with their own set of expectations, disappointments, and fears. These will leak out in interactions with each member of the family. But, we don’t have to allow them to hijack our day.
We might fall into communication patterns that are not as healthy as we hoped. Yet, hope is not lost. Each time, we can forgive ourselves and try again.
So, what is helping you navigate this pandemic?
I’d love for you to share in the comments below or on the socials with the hashtag #embraceimperfection.